Discussion about Nov Rumor, and then Conflicting Rumors
I told ya’ll I was filing the “November in November” rumor in the too-good-to-be-true file. I posted it because it is out there and needed to be talked about. I fantasize with J about them having most of July already done and then just breezing through August since it’s so small. But, is it realistic? Probably not, but it’s a nice fantasy.
I do not think that China really cares about the income we contribute. It’s such a small percentage of what their government brings in. I do think the orphanages care, but not Beijing. And, if the slowdown is for political purposes, then the CCAA is only following the instructions from higher up in the government and things will not speed up unless the CCAA is given instructions to speed up. OTOH, if the slowdown fits into the “perfect storm” analogy then as I’ve said before, as the chaos from the perfect storm fades away we should see things at least semi stabilize.
Personally, I think we will continue to see them take two to three months to get through a month, with the exception of a few of the light months. I don’t like thinking that, but it seems like the most realistic possibility at this point. I’ve spent a good part of the last ten or eleven months insisting that they MUST speed up because they simply can NOT continue in this fashion or the program will eventually be pointless. They haven’t sped up yet, in spite of my insistence that they must. I still have my fantasy, but realistically, I’m not counting on my fantasy.
Okay, I have more current things to talk about.
- Several agencies who have clients logged in between June 29 and July 13th are telling their people that they do not expect referrals, that they have no knowledge of referrals being on their way.
- At the same time, a lot of agencies have notified their people that referrals are on their way, and that the cut-off is 7/13. I’ve lost track of exactly how many, but most of the big ones are saying this, and lots and lots of small and medium sized ones. Most agencies seem to expect them Monday, some say they could come tomorrow.
- I have one report that one agency has told their people that referrals through July 15th will arrive next week. I’d love to have a secondary confirmation of this one.
- I still don’t know what to think of the families with late July LID’s who were told they have been matched. It seems that the agencies were told this by the CCAA, and yet now the CCAA is saying they are not included in this batch. My imagination is having a lot of fun with this one.
July 27th, 2006 at 8:52 pm
Hi RQ
First, i have to say you rock for doing all of this work for everyone.
Second, I may vomit with all of this date fluctuation!!
I would soooooo love to go in September not October (from here it takes 7-8 weeks from the time you get your referral to travel, not sure in the USA but it sounds faster).
ARGH!!!
July 27th, 2006 at 9:11 pm
Yup, this is what I am hearing, as well: that what is in the mail is TA’s, not referrals. I guess, like everything else in this crazy experience, we’ll have to wait and see. We should have more of an indication tomorrow, with some packages possibly slated to arrive.
I have to admit, however, that if these packages prove to hold TA’s and not referrals, I, personally, may have to swear off the rumor rollercoaster. I really admire those of you who are able to take all of this with a grain of salt; I, unfortunately, have my heart broken each time.
6/30 LID
July 27th, 2006 at 9:16 pm
Please, please, please, don’t break my heart. Let my daughter be here tomorrow (or Monday). Please.
July 27th, 2006 at 9:22 pm
Pop!
That was the sound of my balloon bursting~ With a late Dec LID, I knew it would be too good to be true!
July 27th, 2006 at 9:23 pm
this is totally crazy! i’ve never seen the likes! usually the “big” agency that gives stork alerts is right on (since 2001 at least!)…so we just wait and see…
just…wow!
July 27th, 2006 at 9:24 pm
Hi. I have never posted as I try to stay away from rumors… until now! My agency posted on their website that referrals are being sent and will cover through July 13. (should hear more by beginning of next week) I wish it were going to be more but am greatful that we are so close. I trust my agency and am hopeful for an August referral.
LID 7/26/05
July 27th, 2006 at 9:31 pm
LatejuneLID, I hope that your referral comes tomorrow or Monday! It is indescribable, the feeling of seeing your daughters face for the first time!! However, I thought people were crazy when they would say, “the wait for TA is much worse”. Believe it! I never would have before! I hope that the TA’s come with the referrals so that we ALL can rejoice! I have not heard a word of TA but lots that referrals are on there way! Ihope you see your childs face very SOON! Take care!
July 27th, 2006 at 9:36 pm
Well if the wait for TA’s is worse, then I can’t wait for the wait to get worse (-:
Wishing for TA’s and referrals so we have some happy people to smile with …
LID 8-24
July 27th, 2006 at 9:40 pm
For what it’s worthk our Stork Alert email contains these two lines:
The stork is on its way…. We have received notice … that the CCAA has mailed the referrals. We can expect forty-four referrals this month, based on this number we are expecting referrals for our July 8th and July 13th LID Families. Barring any unforeseen courier delays, we will most likely receive them within 3 to 5 business days.
July 27th, 2006 at 9:41 pm
oops… more than 2 lines, I guess.
July 27th, 2006 at 9:48 pm
I do believe they are on the way. The European agency that is always right has said it, the “stork alert” agency has said it, and about a dozen other agencies are saying it.
I’m just wondering why some agencies know nothing at all about something that other agencies are hoping to see tomorrow.
And, I’m wondering at the one agency who is supposed to be getting them through the 15th.
And then there are all of the people with late July LID’s who’ve been told they are matched but won’t be in this batch.
Yes, very strange month.
July 27th, 2006 at 10:12 pm
It’s been a crazy year and even though I already have my daughter, I still follow the rumors because so many friends are going through this process and I feel their pain. I got my referral a year ago from tomorrow and waited 5 weeks for TA (my TA came with the next month’s batch of referrals). I actually thought the wait for the referral was much worse than the wait for a TA! I was so emotionally drained through the whole process I swore I would never go through it again. Now looking back, I remember the terrible (TERRIBLE) wait - and I only waited 7 months - and yes, I will be doing it again. My daughter is worth every tear and every moment I waited (I missed the June 2005 cut off by a couple of days and was devastated at the time, now I am so thankful I missed that cutoff). No one could comfort me at the time with the words I am now saying to you, but one day you will be trying to comfort someone else with these words too. What upsets me now is knowing that there are so many children in China waiting for a home and the bureaucracy is delaying the process. It’s now the wait that the children have rather than the wait I have that keeps me awake at night. It breaks my heart to think that my daughter spent 8 1/2 months not having a mother’s love and kisses every night. But it really breaks my heart that thousands of children will never be adopted because of reasons that no one can explain to me (I believe that there may be “less paper ready” children available, but not that there are less children available). I hope you all get good news soon and we can give all these babies our love! Nothing brightens my day more than referral day and Gotcha Day. Anna
July 27th, 2006 at 10:17 pm
I just logged onto 2 different message boards, for two different agencies and the agencies say that referrals are on their way through July 13th!!!! Congrats to all who are in that date range.
July 27th, 2006 at 10:18 pm
My agency (well known) does not receive word about mailed referrals or TAs until they actually arrive. It’s just how they do things. They are truly not “in the know” as they say. They usually get wind of the mailings from clients like me who call in with the rumors! lol
July 27th, 2006 at 10:27 pm
Hello, I was just on one of the other boards and someone posted that someone with the last batch of referrals received a TA today! I am trying to get more info, but non as of yet! Leia, I hope that your wait gets worse VERY SOON!!!! :) Take care all!
July 27th, 2006 at 10:30 pm
Crazy month, indeed. Just want to clarify one point in my earlier post: what I have heard about TA’s being potentially in the mail cannot be confirmed, either. It is also a RUMOR! Again, all we can do is wait and see. Obviously, though, I am hoping with all my heart that the packages enroute to the US contain referrals AND TA’s!
July 27th, 2006 at 10:33 pm
I forgot to mention that when I got my TA last year, 5 weeks after my referral (on July 28, 2005) and in the same package as the next batch of referrals, I would estimate that the vast majority of people with my referral date received their TAs on the same day that I did. At that time, my agency, which doesn’t say much, told me that the CCAA tries to send referrals and TAs at the same time as often as possible in order to save shipping costs (even though the departments work independently). I don’t know if that was just a rumor or a guess on their part, but my agency still seems to get TAs and referrals on the same day. Anna
July 27th, 2006 at 10:39 pm
I just want to see confirmation from someone (European agency?) that referrals are arriving. Even if we don’t get a referral until Monday, I’d feel better if I could see a post from Spain or Ireland that referrals were actually sent and rec’d. I promised my SW that I wouldn’t show up on my agency’s doorstep tomorrow, but all bets are off if I don’t hear from them Monday morning.
Off topic, anyone hear that if your child is from Guangdong, that you must stay three weeks, not two? I haven’t crossed that bridge yet, still just want to get that referral. Our first child is from Guangdong so we did request that province second time around. If we have to stay three weeks, that will change our childcare plans for our 3.5 year old. Anyone care to sit next to her on a very long plane ride to China?
July 27th, 2006 at 10:49 pm
*#&$(#*! What in the world is going on? This whole wait gets more bizarre every month in trying to figure it out.
I SO hope referrals AND TAs are here ASAP, pronto, on-the-double, immediamente (You get the idea).
I’m going to go more nuts than I already am. Can strait-jackets be ordered in bulk?
July 27th, 2006 at 10:52 pm
RQ says: “I do not think that China really cares about the income we contribute.” I doubt they sneeze at the over $45,000,000 we pour into the orphanage system every year. That is not including the orphanage gifts of medicines, washing machines, air conditioners, clothing and additional money families give them. And once you’ve travelled to Mainland China and have seen some of these cities we go to to get our children, you will see hotels that exist mostly on the international adoption “trade”. There is a tremendous amount of money that is generated by this. That doesn’t mean that there aren’t political forces at work - there certainly are. They can, and usually do, have nothing to do with these children or adoption. Read your newspapers and keep up on US/China relations. Its a much better indicator of wait times than all this other nonsense floating around.
July 27th, 2006 at 11:15 pm
realitycheck maybe you can tell me when I can expect my baby girl….?
LID 9/7/05
July 27th, 2006 at 11:24 pm
I Love Lucy, the point is is that no one can tell you when because the CCAA is not now, or ever, going to say. No matter who claims to have information from a “reliable source”, it just is not the case. All anyone can say is that you will have your baby girl but no one can, for sure, say when.
July 27th, 2006 at 11:31 pm
Thanks realitycheck, I think we all know that. But I think we feel a certain comfort in the fact that we can come here and hope together. Sure it’s all rumor until it happens…waiting in the dark is tough and this site brings some light, rumor or truth
July 27th, 2006 at 11:38 pm
Just getting started gathering the essentials for our dossier, and a friend of ours (who recently welcomed the adorable Flora Bailey into their forever family from Nanchang) told us to listen to what the Rumor Queen had to say.
We’re using a fairly reputable agency, but we just can’t shake the feeling that they’re holding back from us. I mean, how can they really not know what’s going on in China? Our social worker is telling us that the wait time is supposed to decrease, and that it should eventually get back to 6-7 months from LID at some point early next year. Plez tell me this is the truth!
July 27th, 2006 at 11:41 pm
chinamikeblack, just like realitycheck says, no one really knows. All we can do is hope things go faster. I’m hoping to travel in Nov..and my LID is 9/7.
July 27th, 2006 at 11:44 pm
chinamikeblack, one good thing is that I’ve heard from RQ is that Aug and Sept are fairly lite so things may pick up..
July 28th, 2006 at 12:04 am
“Lucy, you got some ’splainin to do!!!”
Not really a response, but I’m trying to keep my s–t together for this whole bloody wait.
It seems like no one knows for sure how this all plays out. I keep going back and forth, as I read all of the postings: does CCAA know what’s going on in the future, or don’t they? Do all of the small/mid/large agencies have some little tidbit of info that we’d love to know, or don’t they? Can anyone give me an idea of which decade we may bring our little Christie Mae home?
Sorry if this sounds all crazy like, but I sure would like to know what to expect. Any advice for the wait? Thinking that sipping more than a little bit of Merlot might help!
July 28th, 2006 at 12:14 am
chinamikeblack, I’m hitting the chamomile tea pretty hard myself. I’m on pins and needles with an imminent (or is it???) referral. It sure would be nice to know something for sure. Just a scrap of definite information would do my nerves a world of good. Monday’s ok, really, it’s fine. I just want to know for sure. 17 months of uncertainty is wearing on me.
July 28th, 2006 at 12:21 am
chinamikeblack, when we started the wait was 6-7 months the 7-8 then 8-10 etc. my best guess now is it will stay at 12 months or less. China may speed up the process but I really don’t know if any one can predict the wait. I would be prepared for 12 months and hope you’re pleasantly surprised!
Good luck, she will be worth the wait!
July 28th, 2006 at 12:27 am
I think a surprising number of agencies don’t hear (and don’t ask) about referrals coming, but we have gotten used to the new website changing (yep, still not changed) so without the verification things are crazy this round. Okay, at least I’M crazy this round.
July 28th, 2006 at 12:36 am
lucy/sophie/livinglife
thanx for the words of encouragement. truth be told, as long as my baby comes home to me some day, who cares about if it takes three months or five months or twelve months or more? i know, i know, i don’t want to wait a second more than i have to for my baby girl to come home–but, everyone keeps telling me that their little girl is the one meant for their family–if that’s true, maybe that should make the wait a little easier…
July 28th, 2006 at 12:50 am
Is anyone sick of people asking “so have u got the kid yet” because i sure am..i meandont get me wrong im SO glad that we have friends that support what we’re doing but it is getting OLD having to explain the same thing over and over…and i mean if we had the “kid” yet don’t you think they would be the first to know..grr…just a little stressed out…im so ready to bring Chloe HOME….NOOOWWW!!!
LID 8/11
July 28th, 2006 at 1:02 am
2china4chloemadison, I know it gets real old. BUT your wait is almost over!
July 28th, 2006 at 1:03 am
2china…
haven’t been through this yet, but we’ve been warned about all the people with good intentions asking about the latest update. what do people think, really?
“So, it’s been a few days since we’ve asked…any word yet?”
“Funny, you should ask…yes, we actually traveled to China and back since yesterday to get our darling little girl…yes, I know it’s surprising that I’m back at work today, but what’s even more surprising is that you keep asking the SAME F—-ING QUESTION EVERY SINGLE DAY—DO YOU REALLY THINK IF I HAD SOME GOOD NEWS I’D LOOK AS DEPRESSED AS I DO RIGHT NOW? I’LL TELL YOU WHAT–JUST ASSUME THAT MY LIFE SUCKS AND THAT I HAVE NO F—–G IDEA ABOUT MY DAUGHTER UNTIL I TELL YOU OTHERWISE, ALLRIGHT?
So I’m bitter about this. Sue me.
July 28th, 2006 at 1:11 am
I Love Lucy..
Thanks for the positive attitude..i sure needed it!!
chinamike….
lmao i love what you wrote..i feel like saying that so much but i don’t want to come off being an ass because im not meaning to be but in the back of my mind im totally bitter like you..hehe
July 28th, 2006 at 1:28 am
chinamikeblack - he he. How many times have I felt like saying EXACTLY the same thing. My husband’s response, when asked this (he’s a bit more rude than me!) is “yeah, we went to pick her up last week but decided she was too ugly and came back without her.’”!! Doesn’t it just drive you nuts - and it’s ALWAYS the same people who ask, every F****** time they see you. Grrrrrr………
July 28th, 2006 at 2:03 am
Just confirming as well as Mollysmum- TA’s, referrals and sometimes LID’s are all in the same parcel.
July 28th, 2006 at 3:01 am
To touch on your last point, it is very possible for the CCAA to have a person match then not send it out. This exactly happened to us in 2003. We were matched before referrals went out but the CCAA kept it. The CCAA stated that they wanted us to wait for the next group. We were a very small agency so they wanted 3 in the travel group. There were 2 families our month then and expedited family the following month that we had to wait for.
July 28th, 2006 at 6:26 am
china mike ………. how the hell can you read my mind!
i love lucy ………. we are also lid 9/7 which means if we get referred November we’ll be travelling January. Can you believe a friend of mind said “you’ll have the best christmas ever…… buying loads of things for Lia” - what the f***!!! This ‘friend’ has already adopted and she can be sooooo smug at times. I spent all last christmas hearing - ohh your next christmas will be so different as she’ll be home by then. Please. please. please let us have an October referral at the latest.
July 28th, 2006 at 6:51 am
donandtamara - I’ve just never seen so many people affected before, with dates so far out. There are several July 22nd people, and one July 27th person. That’s a long way out to be done and not be able to send them.
So, like I said… it’s a mystery.
July 28th, 2006 at 7:02 am
realitycheck, I’m somewhat astonished at your presence here, given “all this nonsense”, etc. Wouldn’t your own time be better spent, as you say, ‘reading newspapers & keeping up on US-China relations’? (though many sources used for such info are also notoriously — and often deliberately — inaccurate.) Perhaps you ought to be passing the wait by learning to speak several Chinese dialects fluently? Or at least by not telling others what they ought to be doing to cross this long & strange & difficult territory.
July 28th, 2006 at 7:03 am
It’s a mystery alright. As is the fact it’s now 7pm on Friday in Beijing and still no change on the website. But maybe the IT department is still settling in.
July 28th, 2006 at 7:09 am
What’s happened to Spain? Long time-no hear. Curious.
LID 9/9
July 28th, 2006 at 7:18 am
Katri - the European-country-that-is-usually-right has said the 13th, and that they were mailed Wednesday.
July 28th, 2006 at 7:54 am
Do we usually here about matching past the date of referrals sent? I think this is the first time in my year of waiting I have heard people say they have been matched and it wasn’t sent.
This really seems so strange. Celebrated one year yesterday of our LID. 7.27 LID
CC
July 28th, 2006 at 7:57 am
No, we do not usually hear of this.
I am aware that they sometimes get into the next day (or two) and can’t send them because they only send when they can send all of a day (they don’t want say “most of 7/14″, they want to say “all of 7/13″). But I’ve never heard of them matching that far off from the cut-off.
July 28th, 2006 at 8:40 am
sometimes think i wont ever get a referral.it does comfort me to know many of you have been matched and waiting for TA and others are in the upcoming batch of matches. got to get myself back on track. think positive. learn more about raising a child,save more money, enjoy waking up late when i want to, crochet more stuff for my little one (and the little ones in the bellies of 6 of my friends) ….gonna make lemonade with my lemons, put my lemons in a Carona..something like that.
July 28th, 2006 at 9:12 am
mattnglo,
can you crochet some outfits and blankets for the 7 little ones in bellies that I know. Also, the 4 that are already here and the parents who have already started on the next siblings for the 7 that they already have…
Man its been a long 3 years.
July 28th, 2006 at 9:17 am
comeonstork, I know what you are saying! My sister-in-law has had 2 since we have been trying to start a family. Its really hard.
I also relate to those who keep asking. I’d love to make some sort of t-shirt. What would it say? “NO, I have NOT heard anything yet” Who else has suggestions for t-shirts?
July 28th, 2006 at 10:06 am
Adoptingliberty -
Go to cafepress.com they have great and some really funny adoption & China t-shirts..some are tacky but some are really cute…several about waiting.. hope that helps.
July 28th, 2006 at 10:09 am
threebluesteps…I know enough people who have been hurt by these rumors to justify my time here. And it is because I have educated myself that I can pass the wait for my child clamly and rationally. This isn’t my first time at the rodeo.
July 28th, 2006 at 10:26 am
realitycheck -
I’ve chosen not to say anything for a while.. but I don’t like your tone.. each time you are one this site you are extremely condescending. This is a rumor site and we all understand that.. we are all hurt when certain rumors don’t come to fruition.. unfortunately it’s part of the process… if you don’t like this site.. go somewhere else but please stop looking down your nose at the rest of us who come here for support and any information (rumors or otherwise) we can get our hands on. You have a right to your opinion certainly but please give us a break with your “holier than thou” attitude.
July 28th, 2006 at 10:49 am
My opinion is —
realitycheck = Troll
Definition of Troll: A contributor to an online discussion whose purpose in posting is primarily is to generate intense debate, often with intentionally inflammatory rhetoric. Troll literally “troll,” a form of fishing, for reaction from contributors to the forum with the intention of stimulating a flamewar.
July 28th, 2006 at 10:59 am
Hey guys,
Love Chinamike’s answer to “all those questions.” I am so sick of it too. Here is the best shirt to wear-check out Salsa in China Store. Lovin this…
http://www.cafepress.com/salsainchina/1372891
Martinis all around!!!
Leslie in TN
July 28th, 2006 at 11:07 am
wow, lots of stuff since i decided to take a break from here a couple of days ago.
well, I for one do not buy that the CCAA is going to send out a referral group near the end of August that contains the rest of July and the entire month of August (as much as it is a nice fantasy though). However, I do think that it’s possible for them to work around the concept of 12-13 months.
A more realistic idea would be that the next referral group goes from 7/14 to 8/12 or 8/15.
I’m still thinking we’ll be a Sept referral (8/10 LID) and that they’ll manage to about 7/27 this next group. I’m thinking like RQ on this one…that it will still take (at least) two or three months to get through each month depending on the “size” of the month.
If the CCAA wants to prove us wrong and do more than just 2 or 2 1/2 weeks, then I’m all for that. Bring it on. :)
July 28th, 2006 at 11:17 am
Zoies mom, thanks for the link, cool. TGredthread, you and rq make sense. BUT, i’m still hoping for August. i would love to see the ccaa site changed, please very soon. have a great weekend. lid-8-8
July 28th, 2006 at 11:32 am
tg, I’m with you and RQ. We keep thinking the CCAA must speed up, I just don’t think they’ll speed up for me ;-) with my 8/26/05 LID I’m planning on an October referral. But if CCAA does more and I go before October - Yahoo!
July 28th, 2006 at 12:09 pm
We all know that this waiting is extremely difficult! I am waiting right along with my daughter and her husband (LID Feb. 06), but I’d just like to encourage you to try to not take your frustrations out on those around you that may not know any other way of supporting you than to ask questions. I am also an adoptive mom. We adopted an infant and a toddler from Russia when our 3 bio kids were in high school and college. We figured out pretty quickly that the people that asked us questions directly were the ones most supportive of our adoption. The ones that thought we were crazy were the ones that asked questions about us behind our backs! That’s not to say that everyone was always tactful or considerate, but for the most part, they were genuinely concerned. FWIW, I remember being frustrated when people would say, “Haven’t you had that baby yet?” when I was 2 weeks overdue with my bio son. (Couldn’t we come up with some creative responses to that one!) I admit, however. that when someone says “adoption is the easy way”, I must restrain myself from stomping on their toes!
July 28th, 2006 at 1:56 pm
Can you believe that there was actually a time when I was ok with the wait times being a little long? I rationalized that it gave us more time to save up and borrow less, that it gave me time to get things done around the house, and it gave us more time to settle on a name. Well. . . I’m running out of house projects and we’ve come up with a name. Still working on the saving.
What’s really sad is that we’re only about half way through the wait if it stays at 12 months! (We have a 2/9 LID and it will be 6 months on 8/9.) I’m going to be a basketcase by the time I reach the point where most of you are now!
Is summer over yet? I’m ready for some college football to keep my mind off of all this!
July 28th, 2006 at 2:37 pm
I think it’s safe to be in a place somewhere between realitycheck and rumor…(closer to rumor)
realitycheck, if you’re not interested in what rumors are flying around, why would come to this site?
RQ, keep up the good work!!!
July 28th, 2006 at 6:01 pm
We have a LID of 8/8. Our immigration paperwork for our daughter expires 11/23. Our fingerprints will expire in Aug. We can have those done again no problem. It is the I-600 that is the issue. If you don’t return to America by 11/23 we have to redo the I-600. Does anyone have any experience on this?