R3
A European agency is also saying the cut off is the 14th.
Remember, I don’t put my reputation behind it until we hit an R4.
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Note from RQ: The section below is for comments from ChinaAdoptTalk.com's community of registered readers. Please don't assume that I agree with any particular comment just because I let it stand. Posts are generally only removed if they don't follow the rules of the site. Anyone who fails to comply with the rules of the site may lose his or her posting privilege. 97 Responses to “R3”Leave a ReplyYou must be logged in to post a comment. |
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November 28th, 2007 at 9:17 am
14th? line moving painfully slow but moving!=)
November 28th, 2007 at 9:17 am
I am very happy for everyone who will get their referral, but getting to the 14th is pretty sad.
If this is the case, then we are likely looking at February for a referral.
I’m going to go throw-up now. Then I am going to go find the cussing thread.
LID 12/20/05
November 28th, 2007 at 9:23 am
Another disappointment. This is getting old.
November 28th, 2007 at 9:29 am
I tried to stay optimistic for so long, believing once November was done things would speed up. I’m still hopeful for some “magical speed-up” next year, but don’t really have any reason to believe that. If they keep referring out a week at a time, my wait time is, what, 6 years (4/07LID)?? Deep down I still believe something has to happen to speed the line up, but can’t imagine when that’s going to happen… Maybe these rumors are wrong and we’ll get a few more days in… Anyway, despite my bad mood, I’m grateful to RQ for keeping us in the know.
November 28th, 2007 at 9:30 am
The 14th????? UGH.
While I’m happy for those getting their referrals. This is sad. That is 4 days of referrals!!! the 10 & 11 were a Sat. & Sun. in 05′…
It is only a rumor & an R3 @ that.
November 28th, 2007 at 9:31 am
sounds like a projection of recent past performance to me. It may be accurate but I think it is more likely a stab in the dark.
Although the CCAA has been doing about 6-8 dyas lately.
AW
November 28th, 2007 at 9:34 am
Congrats to those about to see your babies. This is so disappointing though. I figured December would take 3 months max to get through, at this rate it will take at least 4. This will probably effectively put us directly in whatever mess comes of the Olympics with an LID of 2/28/06.
November 28th, 2007 at 9:41 am
6 days OMG give me brake already.. This sucks (sorry hope that was not crossing the line but it is how I feel this morning). I am happy for the families that are in but for those of us still waiting ..
November 28th, 2007 at 9:42 am
Do we know what this European agency’s next log-in date is?
November 28th, 2007 at 9:49 am
Disappointing (except to Dec 9-14 LID’s of course)! But even though it is only given an R3 at this point I will be very surprised if this does NOT turn out to be the cut-off. Seems like the first rumors, when bad, pan out.
November 28th, 2007 at 10:00 am
I think it is probably true and have been prepared for it, but bummer, huge bummer. LID 12/15
November 28th, 2007 at 10:01 am
Nancy is right–bad news sticks. I know we have issues with our agencies but I do feel for the ones that sent the letters out to everyone. I know they wish they had correct information but it must hurt to report their findings from talks with CCAA and as soon as they send out a letter we/they get such bad news. With one week referrals there is no way the wait will top out at 4 years. I have waited 18 months and will probably have to wait 27 more. That’s four years for me and I’m LID 6/06.
November 28th, 2007 at 10:02 am
Please not the dreaded “Horrid Case”. Inching along at a snail’s pace. Congrats to the families that are in. Not looking forward to this rumour being rate R4. RQ, thanks for the information. My anti-spam word is diapers…poopie ones no doubt.
November 28th, 2007 at 10:03 am
Even though I don’t like this, it is about what I expected. I am learning not to expect too much. We are inching our way to our daughter with and LID of 1/10/06….sigh
Hey there sophajoy08 :)
November 28th, 2007 at 10:05 am
frannysmom-
I hope and pray for you that they got it wrong! I have always said that when we get close, we will end up missing the cutoff by one day :(
November 28th, 2007 at 10:06 am
Will this nightmare ever end?????
November 28th, 2007 at 10:07 am
Hi mom2lk.. I am with you don’t expect to much ugggg will we ever get there???
November 28th, 2007 at 10:09 am
I was really hoping that we would have something to hold onto this Christmas, even though it won’t be a picture of our LK. Some good news at the very least.
November 28th, 2007 at 10:34 am
As a 12/14′r — I’m feeling a mix of JOY (NEXT???), consternation (what if the 14th won’t really make it in this batch???) - and FRUSTRATION for everyone 12/15 and after!!! Many times during this process, my Dad (who is near frantic for me to get to China to bring back his granddaughter that he is dying to spoil!) has often said, “What a test! This is a test! Hang in there!” Simple words- but when said with love mixed with strength, they are powerful.
My mom wrote me a letter many months ago, after I had cried to her tears of frustration about the wait. The letter was so important to me, I’ve kept it - and maybe it will provide some encouragement here to someone. Some excerpt of what she wrote:
“I’m thinking of you tonight, wishing I could run over and make your heart lighter. It does seem forever till you hold your daughter - but the certainty is that you *will* hold her. You will know her all your life on - she will always be your daughter. There is another woman across the world who will not know this child. This child will never know her as mother….
“That, too is a certainty. When you feel so discouraged, try to pray for that mother’s grief and healing. Her sacrifice is your blessing and your daughter’s. What I am trying to say is *not* to feel guilty about this Chinese mother, or feel guilty about your discouragement. That is what it is. But, to find a way out of it. The wait is prolonged, but it will not be forever. The gift of your daughter will be forever….”
What Mom tried to gently remind me is that ultimately, time is on our side — we will be forever families.
My own tentative excitement is weighed against your own yearnings — and collectively, you are all in my prayers!
November 28th, 2007 at 10:36 am
a good old Horrid case to close out the year… here’s to 2008.
And the bar gets lowered again. Oh well. Maybe 2009, late will be my year.
November 28th, 2007 at 10:40 am
lexmeissner,
Thanks for sharing the letter from your mom.
LID 12/20/05
November 28th, 2007 at 10:43 am
my first inclination was great……. now I’m not really likin’ it at all……. will this mean 4 months for December or possibly more?
To those that will make the cut, whatever it may be, great big happy hugs to you, and to those just missing it, yet again……… you are next, or almost next. As for us, I’m terrified, that we’ll never, EVER get there………
But, we don’t know exactly yet………. my agency, has been telling us ahead lately, and nothing from them….. crossing fingers and everything else for greater than the 14th.
Shelley
lid 3/28/06 TODAY :)
November 28th, 2007 at 10:47 am
lexmeissner:
OMG I am sitting at my kitchen table crying like a baby after reading your Mother’s note. Your Mother’s words are so right! We will have the most wonderful gift of all….being a forever family! Thank you so much for sharing such a beautiful letter! I should hopefully be getting a referral this month, but your post and your Mother’s words have touched my heart, and mean so much!
Mauzzie
12/12/05
November 28th, 2007 at 10:49 am
lexmeissener… That was beautiful.. Thank you for sharing it and reminding me that it is not all about me..
Congratulations to you and your family…and your daughter..
My anti spam word is CCAA twice now today… hmmmmm
November 28th, 2007 at 10:49 am
Why am I not surprised *at all*? I was hoping they would do at least a little more than six days (and yes, I know there’s a weekend in there).
I’m tired of waiting for this ’speed up’ which never seems to come. At this rate, seeing our referral won’t happen until 2011…and we’re logged in September 06. This is just too much to take.
Ironic that my anti-spam word is ‘family’, it’s the one thing that I’m starting to doubt will happen.
November 28th, 2007 at 10:49 am
Needless to say, I can live with this! I hope though they can get to the 15th, maybe the 16th…17th and 18th are weekend days, I can’t muster the hope that they can get as far as the 19th, but I was hoping that they would get the 15th and 16th in too…
December is 60% of November RQ said once upon a time, so if November took 6 months, rough math says December will take 4. Which, rough math, puts us at about a week of referrals a time…
I don’t like inching in, I haven’t been sleeping as it is, but I’ll take it over the alternative…it makes me so sad for all the rest of my December friends though.
November 28th, 2007 at 10:59 am
Congrats to everyone that receives their referral this month!!!
….I am sad if the cut-off is the 14th…I had been thinking it would be closer to the 16th…and even that seemed awful….
Hang in there…Your time is coming…
CTG
November 28th, 2007 at 11:06 am
lexmeissner (sp)
you are so lucky to have such a wise mom
November 28th, 2007 at 11:17 am
Gotta love the Horrid Case!!
This really stinks!!
November 28th, 2007 at 11:28 am
This is Beyond Ridiculous!
It’s official, CCAA is just a bunch of lairs :(
November 28th, 2007 at 11:34 am
This is just devastating. Going into this, I really thought we’d feel ourselves getting closer to our daughter every month. Seemed like a reasonable enough expectation. Instead, it feels like we’re getting further away. I might as well just go home from work - can’t stop crying.
Lexmeissener, thank you so much for sharing your mother’s letter. It’s about the only thing that’s helped this morning. Hopefully you’ll have wonderful news very soon!
November 28th, 2007 at 11:36 am
I never really expected that they would get beyond the 14th…..Hoped, but didn’t expect it so I’m not at all surprised.
November 28th, 2007 at 11:39 am
Thanks for sharing this RQ! I know it’s what you do, but all of us really appreciate having somewhere to go to help us understand where we are in line.
November 28th, 2007 at 11:40 am
Pathetic! I am so ticked that is all I can say right now.
November 28th, 2007 at 11:46 am
I think this answers the question of what my next step is. My husband and I are getting closer to the idea of meeting with another agency that does multiple countries. We will remain in line for China; however, I think it’s time to explore our options for concurrent adoptions. We are open to older children and sibling groups so I hope that we can get an adoption done quickly - that way the one year waiting between previous adoptions and the China adoption won’t be compromised.
Basically, all I can say is that this just confirms further my current thought that as a 6/9/06 LID, we have another 18-24 months of waiting OPTIMISTICALLY.
It is what is it. Now that I am more comfortable with the information, I know how to move forward. Of course, it does not stop the “suckiness” factor.
November 28th, 2007 at 11:47 am
I was expecting the 14th too. Very disappointed though that this might be the case. This is the ride that never ends……
Wendy
LID 12/27/05
November 28th, 2007 at 12:03 pm
The tears and frustration of today are a part of the happiness that is surely to come. I physically hurt for all of you missing your referral by a few days, but remember these are rumors at this point. All of you who are in tears and leaving work because of all this just breaks my heart. I am so glad that lexmeissner shared her mom’s letter–what wonderful perspective that gives to all of this. However, is it me, or is the wait a whole lot worse at this time of year? Hugs to all of you December ‘05 LID’ers.
November 28th, 2007 at 12:13 pm
The most puzzling thing is that this doesn’t even constitute a responsible IA program anymore. Children are essentially being referred off of dossiers that are at least two years old – with dossiers logged in further down the road aging by the minute. Yeah – I know it takes an updated home study to get a new/updated 171H, but USCIS’s responsibility is to make sure applicants meet US immigration requirements. That’s not the same thing as being reviewed by the CCAA and meeting China’s IA requirements. The CCAA never sees updated home studies. I mean – it just doesn’t make any sense.
November 28th, 2007 at 12:20 pm
So much for ending the 05 year by the end of this year.
November 28th, 2007 at 12:20 pm
My heart goes out to all of you waiting. Although our wait has been so long and so uncertain at so many times, I feel like it’s just getting worse every month. My spam word is ‘family’- what we will be in just a few days. Finally.
Soon to be, Grace’s mommy, Kara.
LID 12/9/05
November 28th, 2007 at 12:58 pm
Any one else getting the feeling that things will Not speed-up after the Olympics…and actually will end.
China internationally has not been “rocking the boat” before the Olympics and the CCAA’s empty promises of a speed-up play right into this. China is clearly doing this in other international affairs.
I’m starting to get the feeling that they will allow IA to keep crawling until the Olympics, then finally shut the door for good.
Anyone got real info to contradict this? Are we seeing the end?
(LID 3/23/06)
November 28th, 2007 at 1:02 pm
Ugh!!!! I really hope this rumor turns out to be wrong!
p12- yes- I am also getting the feeling that there will not be a speed up!!!!
November 28th, 2007 at 1:07 pm
lexmeissner,
Thank you, thank you so much for sharing your mom’s letter! We should all print it and stick it somewhere (maybe on our computer’s screen to make sure we see it when we go looking for rumors).
About today’s rumors: It’s beyond sad, beyond devastating. I’m not going to say anything more…
November 28th, 2007 at 1:13 pm
I don’t believe it will speed up because there are too many dossiers piled up for that to happen any time in the near future (near being about 3-4 yrs). I have been hearing people excitedly speak of a “speed up” for oh, about 23.5 months now… and it’s NOT going to happen.
I am not disappointed if they get thru the 14th, but grateful!!
And scared to whine that it’s “not enough” because it could get WORSE! Remember the 2-day batch last spring? I’ve been in terror of it happening again. 6 days is three times more than 2 days!
November 28th, 2007 at 1:19 pm
As the recent episodes reported in the news, concerning the port of Hong Kong, show us once again the government of the Peoples Republic of China will do as they please. I wouldn’t be at all surprised to hear of the end of their IA program. Hopefully not before all the good folks in line have their children home though…..
November 28th, 2007 at 1:21 pm
P12, I agree, I don’t think there will be a “speed up” after the Olympics. I think things will continue to move forward @ this snails pace.
Sigh.
November 28th, 2007 at 1:25 pm
I’m sorry for being so negative. It’s important to stay positive and as another posted said, Thankful. Hang in there everyone and congrats to all those who are waiting on pins and needles to see the pictures and hear the names of their babies, hopefully SOON!
November 28th, 2007 at 1:30 pm
Sorry sodergal, not “thankful” here, and possibly it’s time (for me) to get negative enough to seriously look into other options…have I wasted too much time already?
LID 3/23/06
November 28th, 2007 at 1:31 pm
p12 – I can tell you that our agency advised us to let our paperwork expire (LID Sept 06) because they are anticipating a continued decline in the number of children China intends to make available for IA. It would be an exercise in futility for us to keep renewing and making the emotional and financial investment over and over again, and we can always renew later on if the program becomes viable. And - our agency is not guaranteeing a NSN referral at the end of all this. The only thing they will say is that “at this time referrals continue to trickle in once a month.†My guess is that they were advised not to make any promises about China IA. And for many months now they have been moving as many families as possible into the SN program. Look, we’re in a really different situation with our agency. They know we know the score on this mess. And they know it will only exacerbate the situation to throw the usual “we feel your pain” platitudes at us.
November 28th, 2007 at 1:37 pm
chinasyndrome - we too let everything expire. The upsetting thing it was our idea… our agency never suggested the option. In our state it is nearly $2k total cost each time to refile.
I read RQ’s post on not letting things expire because of the Hague…but whats the point? Our LID is 3/23/06 and don’t see any way we will get a referral in time (again!)
November 28th, 2007 at 1:56 pm
I really think its time for those logged in down the road aways to take an honest look at what they want to do with a 4 year wait. Beyond the expiration issues, how would it feel to get to the end of the 4 years and have the program disappear altogether? There are many other countries with programs available. I just dont think we can trust anything the CCAA says at this point. They obviously knew the backlog was occurring, could have implemented quotas, didnt, allowed people to continue to send dossiers, and STILL allow people to send them. Is it money? “Loyalty”? Or something else? I dont know. But its ridiculous. Better to shut this train down before anyone else gets on, and try to sort out this mess. Of course agencies arent going to say any of this because its their livelihood. They will continue to spin the situation in the most optomistic light possible, but facts are facts. There is an enormous backlog of dossiers with really no plan to get through them all at a decent pace. If there was, dont you think CCAA would be bragging about it?
November 28th, 2007 at 2:16 pm
chinasyndrome,
I sent you a PM back on Nov 5th- and didn’t get an answer did you get it? It was a question regarding a post from that day about state department and how much they know. I guess I should just ask it again here, if they know on some level that the program is ending and everyone in line may not get a referral and may not get nsn referral, why are they sitting by letting so many U. S. families spend so much time, enery and money to be so disapointted down the road?
November 28th, 2007 at 2:54 pm
Interesting comments, Chinasyndrome. It is nice to know that your agency is honest with you.
But your comment about the aging home studies begs the question - does the CCAA really care what these home studies really say? After all, if your domestic agency approves you and sends your dossier, you are *assured* a child at the end of this (IA issues and wait aside), so what does the CCAA really do with this info anyway? It isn’t as though, after a family waits two years, that they reject a family…has this ever actually happened based on what is written in the home study?
Therefore, what difference does it make how old the dossier and home study are???
Mezzo
LID 07/07
November 28th, 2007 at 2:57 pm
mezzok–having an agency send your dossier to CCAA does not *assure* that you will receive a referral. there are any number of review room rejections that show the contrary…
where is the crying baby advertisement? i think we all need a collective outlet for our angst….
November 28th, 2007 at 2:59 pm
Breezy:
Personally, I think that the CCAA does whatever they are directed to do by the govt. Who is to say that the government even has this issue on their radar screen on an ongoing basis when they have 1.3 billion people and tons of other issues to deal with. When the CCAA squeaks loud enough, something happens, but I can’t imagine that the PRC govt discusses this stuff every day. I believe that there are IA quotas, that the CCAA is encouraged to adopt out as many SN children as possible, and there are other basic regulations to which the CCAA must adhere. Beyond the scope of those things, the govt doesn’t care… (and my anti-spam word is Beijing! How fitting…!)
m
November 28th, 2007 at 3:03 pm
mlschot:
So you are saying that folks are rejected at the review room? I wasn’t aware of this. Thanks for the info. I thought that folks were often asked to provide additional info, but that rejection wasn’t common. What % of dossiers does this entail?
k
November 28th, 2007 at 3:05 pm
Chinasyndrome, I too, have sent you a p.m. (twice, I think) and haven’t heard back. You keep dropping hints that you know what’s really going on (i.e.: your comment here “They know we know the score on this mess.”). Instead of being so cryptic every month in your comments, why don’t you start a thread in the Forum and clue the rest of us in? That way, we can all put some pressure on our agencies and perhaps, the State Dept. Collectively, we can be strong. Individually, we’re all at the mercy of the powers that be…
I hope you’ll share what you know with the rest of us.
November 28th, 2007 at 3:08 pm
mezzok, i don’t have a percentage–there may be some forum threads that address that subject, but RQ will have a handle on it for sure. yes, there are rejections that occur, and some have taken place after review and prior to referral, to make things worse…
November 28th, 2007 at 3:12 pm
Waiting in Texas, you asked “if they know on some level that the program is ending and everyone in line may not get a referral and may not get nsn referral, why are they sitting by letting so many U. S. families spend so much time, enery and money to be so disapointted down the road?”
Because they are able to continue to see their SN (and now SCOP) programs prosper. Keep in mind, because of this slooooow pace, SN placements are now 50% of all adoptions. IMHO, this continued slow-down is intentional and, in regards to the SN program - successful. Seriously, I’m curious to as how many people choose SN 5 years ago vs. now.
Please don’t flame me - I’m sincerely happy that so many children are finding families. But for each SN placement that is expedited and moved to the front of the line, another NSN family is pushed back. THAT’S why the wait is getting slower and will continue to do so.
November 28th, 2007 at 3:17 pm
I also have asked you Chinasyndrome about a couple of things without answer, on this forum. Of course you do not have to answer, but since we are all anonymous anyway I would be curious to know if you remain in line or if you are abandoning the NSN line. Just would be interesting to see your conclusion about where things are.
November 28th, 2007 at 3:17 pm
i’m not surprised at this rumor….but am worried that it is the first substantial rumor and that the first ones usually aren’t right. sigh. please don’t let it go downhill from here!
November 28th, 2007 at 3:32 pm
First: If we only get till the 14th…then the only good thing is..is that friends of ours WILL have received their referral…Yahoo!!!
Second: The 14th isn’t great, but it is movement. Let’s hope the rumor is wrong and it moves more….”Bright Outlooks” calculate it to be the 15th??? for whatever it is worth…
Third: Family across the globe will be soon seeing their daughters for the first time…priceless. Lets keep our spirts high..the wait is what it is……either embrace it or deal with it on your own terms…..
…..LID March 17, 2006…..
November 28th, 2007 at 3:39 pm
anonymouswait,
I know all about the CCAA special needs etc, in my question when I say “they” I am referring to the state department.
chinasnydrome has mentioned them in a few of her post and seems to think they know whats going on– thats what I am trying to figure out :-)
I also wish chinasyndrome would start a thread and lay it out there for all of us to see and review or atleast send enough info that can be backed up or verified in some way to RQ so she can give us an update. This popping in and posting information that is concerning to all with such certainty and no support is hard to take.
November 28th, 2007 at 3:46 pm
Thanks for the clarification, WaitinginTexas. And you’re right; it is draining, hearing that someone “knows all” but is not sharing. C’est la vie. Thank goodness RQ tells us what she knows…
November 28th, 2007 at 3:49 pm
I see so many comments that CCAA should stop accepting dossiers. I personally do not understand this. If people are willing to wait, don’t they have as much of a right to submit their dossier as those of us already in line? It isn’t CCAA’s job to protect people from the wait or tell them how to build their families. Admittedly this assumes that everyone is properly informed by their agencies, who really need to step up and be honest with everyone.
I can’t see CCAA stopping adoptions completely. They have made no indication to this affect, and have instilled new rules to help limit the number of dossiers. They are moving slow, but maybe the low number this month is partially related to the 1/2 day work days.
And maybe the 14th is just a rumor. We can hope, right?
November 28th, 2007 at 3:52 pm
Breezy makes a good point. Even we can come to terms with a 4-year wait, what I couldn’t handle would be waiting 4 years only to be told that China’s IA program is shutting down and no baby for us. Of course, I have no information that this will actually happen - only my current doomsday outlook - but if I did, I would be kicking myself (to put it mildly) for not pursuing another avenue in the meantime. Ergo, that’s what we’re doing.
November 28th, 2007 at 3:54 pm
hello everyone,when i started this whole process the info from the agency had a 12 to 14 month wait after the lid date.that was in dec 2005 i started with all the neccessary paperwork for the adoption. i can’t believe things slowed down to a crawl. i don’t understand why china can’t put more people on the job over there.i’m 9-16-06. is 2009 possible?
November 28th, 2007 at 4:09 pm
I am so hoping for at least Dec 15th for my fellow December friends.
Come one CCAA, you can do better than this…..
Best regards
Beate
LID 12-8 2005
November 28th, 2007 at 4:37 pm
What I meant to say was “but if it did” (actually happen), not “but if I did” (have information about about a shutdown). Didn’t want to open any cans!
November 28th, 2007 at 4:40 pm
The problem I have with CCAA continuing to accept dossiers is that agencies arent educating their clients on the potential risks of submitting a dossier at this point. Its unfair for agencies or anyone to say yeah it could be at three-four years at this point when in reality, there is absolutely no plan that we have been told about to even KEEP it at 4 years. Referring 7 days a month will in no way keep the wait to four years. So when people “board the train” so to speak by joining this program now, what they truthfully should be told is there are rumors of it leveling out at 3-4 years, but the actions of the CCAA simply don’t match those rumors at this point and there is a very good chance you will wait longer or not get a referral at all. Isn’t that alot closer to the truth? I hear from so many families who completely depend on what their agencies tell them, and in many cases, it’s just simply not true, or it’s only half the story.
November 28th, 2007 at 4:47 pm
Why do I all of a sudden feel sick about the whole programme? Hoping the 14th is the European last LID and someone elses agency has LID’s for the 15th, 16th or beyond!
Maybe RQ can do an ISP line check and make sure that CS is not our sneaky BS that had several titles and names going all at the same time? Or maybe it’s just a cat amongst the pigeons?
November 28th, 2007 at 4:52 pm
Nothing unexpected. There is a difference to being negative and being realistic. All adoption programs have changed over the years, nothing stays the same. Why would China? You can hope, pray, wish and do whatever it is to convince yourself things will change, but this is not going to make anything change. We all know the reasons behind the slow down. Agencies have sent out letters, people who work in China’s SWI have relayed this information, CCAA has made statements on websites and
some agencies have had talks with the CCAA. Yet, people still do not want to believe the inevitable.
The CCAA has dossiers piled high, and it has been this way for a long time. They don’t owe us anything, however, agencies do, we are paying them for a service, and it is up to them to provide any news or information the best they can.
People on the net groups I belong to have submitted their
dossier to China, prepared to wait for whenever because
they are young. However, in the meantime, they are working on building their family through another country
program before that too changes. There is nothing wrong
with being hopeful, but you also have to be pro-active in
building your family and ignoring signs isn’t going to make that happen.
I also believe NSN’ will phase out. Their focus is on SN’s
and the new group of children. Where my ds resided in
China, it was totally funded by a large Christian group.
They cared for really sick children as well. They had many children there that they did not submit for adoption because their disabilities were too extreme. The Chinese Government does not contribute at all. There are also alot of street children in China as well.
I want everyone to receive their referrals so they can end
this nightmare. My first adoption was a nightmare, and
I can totally feel your pain.
November 28th, 2007 at 4:58 pm
lexmeissner…….. THANK YOU for sharing this note, the wisdom and truth it beholds will carry me through this day…… our 20th, lid versary…. I know, I know, me again, but I’m happy to have another notch in my belt, yet sad, that there may be many many more…….
nihao’s the magic word……..
Nihao everyone
Shelley
lid 3/28/06
November 28th, 2007 at 5:11 pm
zhaoneur-
Two reasons, in my book:
1. As you said, there’s the assumption that agencies are being up front with clients, and we know many that are not…
2. I’ve suggested this fact before, and I’ll beat a dead horse here one more time - I personally don’t believe it is in the best interests of the children to be referred to familys on information that is so out of date.
If they suspended for a year, no one who wanted to wait would wait longer, in my humble opinion - it would just make it that the dossiers would be more current, as people would submit closer to when China will get to the 08 dossiers, AND it would be an acknowlegement of where the system in going, so there is no BS that the agencies can spin.
Of course, SN is not a part of this idea…
November 28th, 2007 at 5:22 pm
Hi PeterK:
Putting more folks on the job wouldn’t necessarily speed things up. The issue is more complex than that. Some reasons given have been: “not enough paper-ready babies”, quotas, more SN adoptions, the Olympics, etc. etc. No one really knows for sure what is going on. One thing is certain and that is if PRC wants to be viewed as more than a 3rd world country, IA from China will have to stop…that may be one of their goals. But again, who knows??!!
For you, 2009 may be possible, but don’t be surprised if it is 2010!
k
November 28th, 2007 at 5:23 pm
Strawberryshortcake. Your reasoning makes a lot of sence. I never thought about the fact that this would force agencies to admit the truth. As far as old paperwork, I thought that any significant change had to be documented in a new home study sent to CCAA, but I also know that not all agencies actually send these updates. Thanks for the response!
November 28th, 2007 at 5:25 pm
strawberryshortcake, I totally agree. Suspending acceptance of dossiers for a year or more doesn’t have the effect of turning anyone away who is prepared to wait. And it also on no way extends their wait. To me it makes sense. I know it would impact the agencies, esp. China-only (which mine is) and I’m not sure what to say about that. But if China does for some reason shut down the program, I doubt that most families who got shut out would just sit back and take it without at least trying to re-coup money from their agency.
November 28th, 2007 at 5:28 pm
thank you mezzok, i am getting older. in 2009 i will be 54. i’m still looking forward to it,but i hope china doesn’t think i’m too old to take care of her.
November 28th, 2007 at 5:30 pm
I’m really baffled why they (CCAA) don’t suspend new dossiers…I just don’t see the advantage of continuing to lengthen the wait….except they (CCAA) do see income everytime a dossier is accepted. How sad if they are making the line longer and longer just to receive $600/dossier.
November 28th, 2007 at 5:32 pm
I’ll tell you what I think : Referrals will slooowly trickle in every month until Sep. 2008 and MAYBE after things’ll get a little better … What a boring year 2008 will be (for me anyways with a Dec. 2006 LID!)
Ray :-(
November 28th, 2007 at 5:38 pm
Why would IA have to stop for China to be more than a third world country? In the US, there is some percentage of IA of US babies to other countries. Just not publicized.
babysister
November 28th, 2007 at 6:19 pm
Chinasyndrome, I would also love for you to lay it out there for us. Unfortunately, from reading all your posts, I doubt that will happen. I think at one point you mentioned you are a journalist. Maybe you just love all of the flurry your teasers create. :)
November 28th, 2007 at 6:26 pm
Few days ago a comment was made that maybe China was holding the babies for people not to think they were “exporting” their babies like happenned to Korea during their olimpics. I want to stick with it, and be very positive that after 2008 things will improve. They have too many kids, and I don’t believe that their own people are willing to adopt all of them. To maintain an orphanage costs a lot of money and they cannot just turn down the donations they are getting with each adoption. With an Oct/06 LID, I thought I would have my daughter already in my arms, and in no way I will let the thought of China closing the doors for adoption take over my hopes.
November 28th, 2007 at 6:39 pm
vivinchina-
I hoped that it would be the Olympics, I really did…and I think it may color the thinking a bit, but it’s not THE reason…it would be nice if it was - it would be a tangible notion we could wrap our heads around…and give hope to all my friends after me…
Yes, China has lots and lots of kiddos in SWIs, but they always have - there has never been a push to empty the orphanages. The amount of kids that get to go to IA is miniscule to the overall population of the SWIs, at best. The number of kids in the SWIs has never seemed to be a motivating factor.
November 28th, 2007 at 6:57 pm
just like i said i HATE BEING RIGHT ABOUT THIS.
November 28th, 2007 at 7:52 pm
I have a hard time believing that the program will end and leave people that paid and waited years stay silent.
this community strikes me as a strong one and I can foresee a mini-revolution about something like that…I can not imagine we would all just seat there and take that?
right?
are we???? taking our money,our time and trust??
if they are worry about bad press…well???
I think there ARE many children abandoned in China and this program had a certain decency so…I believe.
I believe is going to better after the Olympics.
e all have to wait until the Olympics are over.
I spoke extensively with my wonderful Chinese doctor and he is under the same impression : the Olympics are probably the major reason for the wait.
and for the 14th…is still an R1 at this point.
let’s hope is better indeed.
let’s not start projecting all this terrible scenarios and let’s make an effort to stay positive. I believe there is an interesting dimension in the wait, for I know it gives it a “waight” for what it is all about.
Funny how wait and waight kind of sound the same…
love to you all.
November 28th, 2007 at 7:55 pm
I’d also LOVE to hear what Chinasyndrome has to say. I always get the impression that there is SO much more to hear, but it’s never said?.
November 28th, 2007 at 8:07 pm
Lexmeissener,
Thank You for sharing your letter…..your mom sounds like a beautiful person who will someday make an amazing Grandmother.
But oh, oh, oh is my heart sad right now…..
4/07 LID and losing almost all hope of ever holding my daughter :(
November 28th, 2007 at 8:15 pm
ups…I meant it’s an R3 at this point…
well…as hard as it is. let’s make the effort of keeping a positive attitude.
really….to go in desparation does not help anything.
As hard is it is…it might be a constructive challenge, if seen under that light: the light of the challenge.
e.
November 28th, 2007 at 8:32 pm
Calamity4e,
oh please don’t say that means a February referral for us 12-20-05′rs. I can’t handle that one. I am also 12-20-05 and even with the horrid case we make it in January right??? I was secretly (or should I say foolishly) hoping for a dec referral. I can handle not getting one because I know it was a long shot. But as far as January is concerned, I can’t see not being there…….Lets keep faith!!
November 28th, 2007 at 8:33 pm
I have to wonder if this other European agency isn’t just telling what they read on that “other” site. Who knows. What I do know is that if CCAA had been more forthcoming about the number of dossiers received each month vs. the number of paper-ready babies vs. the amount they’re allowed to refer I might have a baby right now. Each time we discussed switching countries or trying IVF we decided against it because we thought it would be too close to our China referral. I’d like to shoot myself for being so naive! How could I have known though? If you’re told 6-9 months and then oops all of a sudden 11-12 months and then oops maybe 20 months and now who the freak knows?!?!? Anyone could get confused no? So frustrating. On a nicer note I really enjoyed reading the letter from the future Grandma. It was so nice. I wish my Mom was more like your’s.
November 28th, 2007 at 10:47 pm
Geezy Beezy…
November 28th, 2007 at 11:31 pm
Sorry, dude, it is what it is.
November 29th, 2007 at 7:53 am
I’m touched that my Mom’s letter was even a little bit helpful during this tough week — I told her yesterday how I had “shared her” with others on this forum, and that I felt blessed to be able to have her words to share.
I also know I am blessed to be able to share, be supported, and get feedback online with others around the world who in the same boat (paddle boat??) with me — rowing our way to China!
November 29th, 2007 at 8:12 am
Looking forward to RQs analysis. Usually the bad rumors stick so the 14th is probably it. I am wondering if RQ is going to “downgrade” the projections since horrid and bad case scenarios seem the norm now. I think bad case should move to mid or good……horrible should move to bad…..Yuck. And then we can have a new “horrible” case. As you can see I am quite cynical this morning.26weeks to LID so I project 26 more months. Yuck Yuc k
November 29th, 2007 at 11:03 am
Mine must be a row boat then! Never could get those things to go very well……
December 3rd, 2007 at 2:06 am
Not sure if my other post made it…I was told by a very reliable source-the olymics should not (are not?) affect the wait times…..I believe that anyone with LID of the first half of 2006 will get a match in 2008. That is just my personal guesstimate assuming that things do not slow down more which I do not think will happen.