Dexter
I have a cousin who loved to read when we were young, but several years ago I discovered she had stopped reading. She was going through a tough time in her life, and I remembered when reading books was an escape mechanism for both of us. So for Christmas that year I bought her the first 5 Anita Blake books. She loved them, and I heard all year from her how she didn’t have time to read and it was all my fault she was reading instead of (fill in the blank). She bought the rest of the series once she’d gotten through what I bought her, which tells me she really liked it. I thought it did her a world of good, and I’m pretty sure she thought so, too. When she wasn’t complaining about them she was talking to me about what was happening, and we had lots of conversations about the characters and what they were going through.
The next year I got her started on The Hollows, then there was Sookie. And her daughter was old enough two years ago that I bought her the first Twilight book, which mom and daughter read one after the other so they could talk about them together. I’ve been called their “book pimp”, but that’s okay. I think. (You can read about these series on my Books for Grown Ups page)
So, to pay me back for that, she bought me Season One of Dexter for Christmas this year. RK and I are well into it already and can I just say… Oh, My. A serial killer that we root for? Who would have thought? It looks like I can buy seasons two and three, but season four isn’t available yet to buy. I ordered season two over the weekend to make sure it will be here when we finish the first season.
The really creepy thing? Some of the things Dexter says are things RK says. RK is not a sociopath, he’s just a bit antisocial towards people he isn’t already friends with. But, if I ask him to, he can fake being nice, even though I know he’s got the smart-aleck dialogue going on in his head the whole time. Maybe that’s why the series is so popular? We can all see just a little bit of ourselves, or someone we love, in Dexter? Don’t we all have to just put a mask on and pretend to fit into society sometimes? Not all the time, just every once in a while? I don’t know, and I’ll need to get farther into it to decide for sure, but I have all kinds of thoughts about what it says about society as a whole that this show is as popular as it apparently is. I did some research on it, and the season four finale set some records for number of viewers. For a show where the serial killer is the main character – the good guy, sort of. How bizarre is that?
My cousin has gotten RK and I hooked on a TV show. That is also some sort of record, I think.
Dexter: The First Season
Dexter: The Second Season
Dexter: The Third Season
I have no idea when season four will be released on DVD. Hopefully before we get through season three.
January 4th, 2010 at 9:54 am
LOL!! We are hooked on Dexter, too!! As creepy as it is, we just love it! :)
January 4th, 2010 at 10:09 am
DH and I ADORE this show (it’s loosely based on a book, which really pales in comparison to the show). Enjoy it…they really have some wonderful twists, and season 4 was perhaps the best season yet….though DH isn’t sure he wants to follow it anymore (a plot twist really threw him for a loop). Keep us posted on how you like it.
January 4th, 2010 at 11:01 am
I have been a fan of Dexter for a couple of years now. But after season 1 of The Ice Truck Killer, I had to take a mini break and watch the other seasons a little slower with more time between shows. It became a bit gory for me. But I watched the last season in real time on Showtime and have to say that the ending was UNBELIEVABLE! I hate it and love it all at the same time.
January 4th, 2010 at 11:33 am
I LOVE Dexter! The show AND the character. And yes, I was also totally surprised to find a serial killer so absolutely adorable. Season two made me even more “involved” with him! Just wait, you find yourself just aching for him to kill people so he can be happy! That sounds so awful – I am not a psychotic killer but I do love Dexter! I can’t wait for season 4 to come out! I really don’t have the interest or time to watch TV every week at a specific time… so the only way I watch any TV shows is via DVD. I hate waiting for a whole season for more Dexter, but he is worth it! You really should read the book, too. He is “darker” in the books than in the TV series and not quite as adorable but just as humorous in his sarcastic commentary on life. It’s a little different but I enjoyed the book too.
January 4th, 2010 at 12:16 pm
I was an original Dexter fan when it started. But after two seasons, my stress level and anxiety while watching the show reached an all time high (in perspective; I realize it’s just TV). (Which after watching TV for 30+ years reveals that this is indeed something unique.) My life was already stressful enough at that time, that I had to abandon the weekly addiction. At some point, I may go back to catch up, but it will have to be when I can choose to have those crazy feelings for an hour at a time. But my question is: is Dexter any different than Batman?? one is a superhero; one is a psychopath??
January 4th, 2010 at 1:14 pm
I did a double take when I saw the post title. Two years ago my neighbor lent me the first season with the comment, “It’a hysterical. It’s about a serial kiiler. You’ll love it!” (Of course, this made me question that sanity of my neighbor but… I put the first DVD in and was hooked.) I couldn’t wait until the next season came out on DVD that summer because I don’t have cable. Watched the second season as soon as it came out.
It really is one of the funniest shows I have ever watched…and it is also clever and thought provoking.
If you haven’t watrched it yet… go get it!
M2I
http://www.MyChineseShamrock.blogspot.com
January 4th, 2010 at 1:37 pm
We also just got hooked on this show! We watch the DVD’s from Netflix or stream them directly from Netflix watch instantly onto our tv. It’s awesome!
January 4th, 2010 at 7:33 pm
Dexter is awesome!!!!! All i have to say is just wait…He is one you would want on your side…That’s for sure..and let’s just say, you haven’t seen anything yet…Love it!!
January 4th, 2010 at 9:11 pm
You’re right. The fact that so many seem to love the show and unashamedly root for a fictitious serial killer, says a great deal about society. A very great deal. Sadly.
China4
January 4th, 2010 at 10:14 pm
You know, I’d never heard of this show (or books) until today, here in this post. The more I think about it, the more disturbed I am. Can I ask you folk something?
If this was a show or series of books about a serial child rapist/murderer, someone who brutally rapes and then dismembers 6 month old babies, would you be amused? Would you root for him? Would you “find yourself just aching for him” to find find another helpless child to “diddle” and disembowel so he can be “happy”?
I didn’t think so. So what’s the difference? Seriously? What’s the difference?
I don’t care how “charming” the writers have made this character…Ted Bundy was charming too, and handsome to boot!… how can people make a deliberate decision to watch this show, to support the writers of such unadulterated and reprehensible crap?
It takes a lot to shock me, but frankly, I’m shocked that so many permit themselves to be entertained, and worse, become sympathetic to, a character who is clearly evil to his core.
Wow.
When I was logging in, I inadvertently typed in the wrong password and when it asked me if I wanted to change it to what I’d just typed, I wasn’t paying attention and hit “yes”. Of course, I’ve no idea what I typed as a password, so it’s possible I may not be able to log in here again. All that to say, if this conversation takes off because some take issue with my comments, I may not be able to respond, but know, it won’t be because I wouldn’t want to. We’ll see what happens. In the meantime, I think it’s pretty clear that I’m appalled by the show, to be sure, but more so by the comments above. Utterly.
China4
January 4th, 2010 at 10:56 pm
The timing of this post is down right scary. I had read a post in the forum about the season finale of season 4 and it reminded me I had always wanted to start watching it. I subscribed to netflix last week and I finished season 2 early this morning. That’s becasue I literally stayed up all night watching it. My DH’s alarm went off at 4:30 and he looked at me like I had 2 heads. We watched this first 8 episodes together but then I coulnd’t wait for him. I took a two hour nap today and I am doing surprisingly well. That’s probably because I found a site that I can stream season 3 from. However, after watching the first episode it said I could not watch another for 40 minutes. So I check RQ to fill the time and it is a post about Dexter…Maybe I fell asleep and I am actually dreaming. LOL
January 4th, 2010 at 11:01 pm
China4 – I’ve found it’s generally not a good idea to blast people when you have no idea what they are talking about.
Dexter only kills bad people, and he makes sure they are bad before he kills them. He works for the Miami PD as a forensics blood spatter analyst, so he’s got the means to get proof of someone’s guilt before he kills them. And when he does, he shows the people pictures of the people they’ve killed just before he kills them, just to make sure they know why they are dying. In one case, for a killer who had killed a bunch of little boys, he dug them up and forced the guy he was killing to look on their bodies before he killed the guy.
You really shouldn’t blast people if you don’t understand what they are talking about. Yeah, Dexter needs to kill to satisfy his cravings to kill, but he’s learned how to do it and not be quite as big of a monster. Does that make it right? No, it doesn’t. But I had no problems watching the man be killed who had killed all of those little boys, either.
I think what this show says about our society doesn’t have much to do with his being a serial killer… it has to do with our unhappiness with the justice system, it has to do with the fact that many have to put on a mask at least sometimes in order to function in this society. Dexter wears his mask all the time, I mainly wear mine at business social functions, or when I need to be nice to someone at work in order to play politics but I’d love to completely ignore them and pretend they don’t exist in my world, or when I have to deal with my MIL. There are times we must wear a mask, and when we watch Dexter do it, it resonates. I think.
January 5th, 2010 at 12:37 am
“Blast” people? I don’t think so. My intent was to cause people to consider at what point we draw the line when it comes to entertaining ourselves?
Regardless, he’s a serial killer…a man who has a “need” to kill. Who delights in it, feels “happy” when he does so? And that somehow makes it ok? Vigilante justice with a good, hard twist of perverse pleasure, pleasure which somehow fulfills his psychopathic bent? That’s what passes for entertainment these days? That’s what people laud?
Psychopaths, by their very definition, do not act altruistically. Their only purpose or goal in life is to serve themselves. They generally feel nothing for others, unless it suits their purpose. And there’s the rub, isn’t it? The writers of this series must have painted him as some sort of sympathetic soul for so many to gush about him as has been expressed previously.
The viewer is persuaded to justify his psychopathic actions because they believe he is doing what he does, at least in part, with the noble intent of avenging the deaths of others, when clearly this is not the case – as psychopaths do not “feel” for others. The character is killing for one reason and one reason only, to fulfill his needs – and the viewer is sucked into rooting for him, a man equally as evil – as his “victims”.
I still maintain that the whole premise is appalling, as is the seeming adulation this show has garnered.
China4
January 5th, 2010 at 9:17 am
China4-
Great thing about this forum is that there are so many different people with different experiences and likes and dislikes. It is a great place for us all to support each other during and after the wait. We all have the right to discuss topics that mean something to us. While I have never watched the show so I can’t comment on the theme but I am intrigued reading the comments Clearly you dislike the show and the premise. Point taken. Others like it and enjoy discussing – this forum allows for discussion.
January 5th, 2010 at 10:52 am
Shay68, I haven’t said this (or any other) discussion ought not take place, so I’m unclear as to the point of your post.
As for your reference to “likes and dislikes”, people once “liked” watching human beings being ripped apart by lions in the colloseum in Rome.
Some things are wrong. Just plain wrong. Finding entertainment value in women, children, and men being torn limb from limb by lions is wrong. I’m arguing that finding entertainment value, and not only finding value, but rooting for, the murderous actions of a psychopath, even a fictional psychopath, equally wrong as in my opinion, it sears the conscience of otherwise good people.
China4
January 5th, 2010 at 1:06 pm
china4 – the first rule around here is to be nice – it’s possible to disagree without being hateful. That might be something you want to work on.
As for the rest of your comments, less than 10% of the show focuses on killing, and he does not kill in every episode. You are speaking of something that you don’t know about, and all that does is show your ignorance. Best stop before you put your other foot in your mouth. If you just think the idea of such a show is wrong then fine, that’s your opinion and I can respect that. But the judgments you are making on it, and on the people who are watching it, are done out of ignorance of how the show is handled. I had my doubts at first, too. But it’s a deep, sometimes dark (sometimes not), study of human nature. Both the psychopathic variety and the non-psychopathic variety. It’s also pretty funny at times. RK and I probably laugh more during a Dexter show than we do during a stand up comedy routine. I love hearing the things Dexter is thinking.
Plus, it’s all fiction. Make Believe. Not real. I couldn’t enjoy it if it were real. Fictional stories entertain us for a variety of reasons, but one of the biggest has to be that we resonate in some way with one of the characters. Or… that it’s just so bizarre it’s like watching a train wreck, and you can’t look away. When my cousin was explaining it to me, I expected Dexter to be the second, turns out it’s the first.
January 5th, 2010 at 2:18 pm
What is “not nice” about what I’ve had to say? Which words have been “hateful”? Have my actual words been “not nice” or “hateful”, or is it simply that I disagree that this type of “entertainment” is acceptable, and have the fortitude to say so?
As for having my “foot in my mouth” and speaking out of “ignorance”, that’s not the case. I’ve given myself a pretty fair to middlin’ education about this show since last night and have come away even more appalled that this type of faire passes for “entertainment”, and not only the faire, but the character himself being lauded, as indicated in some of the comments above.
The only thing anyone could *possibly* have construed as “hateful”, was my reference to spectators enjoying the “entertainment value” of people getting torn limb from limb in the Roman colliseum. However, if one had taken the time to actually try to hear what I was saying there, one would understand that I was not making a comparison between a fictional show and historical fact. I was making the point that what people “like” or “don’t like” should not be the basis for approval.
No doubt some people “like” all manner of things which you and your readers would find reprehensible, and you might even argue vehemently against those very things, and rightfully so. “Like” or “don’t like” is a purely subjective standard – a standard which blows in the wind depending upon the whims of individual people. Some things should be measured by much more than how one “feels” about it. That was my point, not to say or imply that those who watch Dexter would also delight in the spectacle of the Roman colliseum.
In my opinion, the crux of the matter is this; it is one thing to watch a show or read a book which has violence in it, even unspeakable violence (although I, personally, don’t care to), and to come away understanding clearly who and what the perpetrator is. But it is quite another to watch a show and allow the line of morality to be blurred to such an extent that one roots for and applauds an evil character – and Dexter’s character is clearly evil. That’s what I meant when I referred to the conscience of otherwise good people being seared, meaning that the clear line between good and evil becomes skewed in the eye of the viewer, which is precisely the case in this instance, and that which is intended by the writer.
When I read a book or watch a movie, I typically don’t do so merely for entertainment sake, though I am often entertained, and heartily. I typically endeavour to consider the worldview being expressed – sometimes conveyed innocently, sometimes deliberately – and ask myself what the writer’s/director’s purpose might be – why he/she chose to present the story as they have. As much as we sometimes like to deny it, everyone has an agenda of sorts – everyone – and so, when I read or watch, I do so with a critical eye in order that I might more fully understand where the writer/director is “coming from”. And so, with this particular series, I wonder…and have come to my own conclusions about why he would create and develop an evil character in such a way that people would sympathize with him.
That said, now that I know something about the series – having read a great deal about it – I’m puzzled by something else. Here we are, adoptive or prospective adoptive parents, people who’ve likely heard all manner of stereotypical nonsense about adopted children, and we are delighting in yet another story which paints the adopted child as a psychopath. That alone would be cause for me to eschew this type of “entertainment”, as I don’t care to lend credence to such nonsense or support those who do.
Needless to say, this is your site and you are free to do with my posts what you will, and even my membership, but upon reviewing what I’ve said in this post and in my previous ones, I don’t believe you can make the argument that I’ve not “been nice” or broken any other of your stated rules. I have simply disagreed with you and others and have expressed why I have done so.
China4
January 5th, 2010 at 2:54 pm
Thank you RQ for a nice defense of people who don’t mind stretching their imagination into realms where we would never actually want to go in real life. I like Dexter AND I like what some have called the “evil” Harry Potter AND I like science fiction that presents future worlds with shocking twists of morality or values AND I like vampire stories, etc. Like all of this other “entertainment” I appreciate, Dexter makes you think. He lives dangerously close to violating his “code”. Our weakness may not be the desire to kill people, but we all have a value system that we should examine regularly. I like how Dexter does that. He thinks about whether he is “right” or “wrong”, “good” or “bad” all the time.
January 5th, 2010 at 6:10 pm
I wouldn’t say that I “root” for Dexter to kill anyone. The main reason I watch Dexter is because it is truly an ORIGINAL IDEA with some of the most ORIGINAL writing that I have seen. Kudos to ShowTime. They aren’t afraid to *go there*. ShowTime also produces Weeds and Californication. Again, two more shows with ORIGINAL IDEAS and ORIGINAL WRITINGS. It’s called being open-minded. I hate reality TV. But I probably wouldn’t judge anyone for liking it. I’m more afraid of the mass public thinking mediocre television is worthy of any attention than I am a fictitous serial killer.
January 6th, 2010 at 4:23 am
OK China4. Can you please watch the first season before you comment again! They do not paint him as an adopted child that is a psychopath. His Mother was murdered in front of him and is clear in the first season, when he saves his “adoptive” sister from his “biological” brother, who he feels his real family is. Please, even if you don’t agree watch some of it so your comments at least don’t completely contradict the show.
BTW- about this comment “I’m shocked that so many permit themselves to be entertained, and worse, become sympathetic to, a character who is clearly evil to his core.”
I don’t permit myself…..I chose to watch and I love this show. My husband and I think he is hysterical in the comments he makes to himself. Laugh out loud funny.
This comment-”finding entertainment value, and not only finding value, but rooting for, the murderous actions of a psychopath, even a fictional psychopath, equally wrong as in my opinion, it sears the conscience of otherwise good people.”
That to me implies that you feel us finding entertainment value in this show is wrong. You haven’t even seen the show! I’m sorry but most of society wishes that people who do evil things and then get away with it due to a technicality, would and could be held accountable. That is not making us evil to share this opinion. Besides it a TV show. Just because you enjoy understanding the motives of a movie producer and trying to find out what world view they are portraying, I don’t. I like to be entertained by Fiction. I read vampire novels, trashy romances and also stories that make me think. I think there is a lot of Dexter in all of us and I believe that is why this show is so popular. Again, get past the serial killer part and watch the first season if nothing else for research. You may be surprised at what you see.
January 6th, 2010 at 8:27 am
Mt4H – I think talking to China4 about this is a lost cause at this point. When someone can’t see that they are talking out of ignorance of something, conversation is kind of pointless. Treating Dexter as a normal adopted kid when he was anything but that.. it just shows how much she doesn’t understand about the show. And if she can’t even see that she’s not being nice with some of what she says? She’s not seeing things clearly when it comes to this show, obviously. Perhaps someone she knew was killed by a serial killer or something, maybe this is hitting close to home and she’s only seeing it emotionally and can’t see it rationally. We don’t know where people are coming from, but this obviously hits a nerve with her.
January 6th, 2010 at 8:14 pm
I have conducted pre-travel briefings for adoptive families and I tell them I roughly categorise the reactions of children on handover into three categories (nothing scientific, just my observations) – those that scream and cry, those that withdraw (shutdown, withdraw into themselves) and the immediately ‘happy’ babies. And I always tell them that it is the ‘happy’ babies that you need to have your wits about you the most. The screamers and the withdrawn are, as RQ points out, showing a grief or stress response (and there is a heap for them to grieve or stress about – while you have been planning for years for this moment, your child did not know that they were suddenly going to lose what they knew as ‘home’ and their carers and be taken away by these strange looking, strange smelling strangers); the ‘happy’ baby is more than likely implementing a ‘coping’ mechanism learnt through institutionalisaton – babies who ‘please’ their carers get the most attention, but deep down they are as stressed as the other children, and like putting a lid of a volcano sometime, somewhere that pressure is going to release, maybe more intensely. I am always concerned when I read that children have instantly attached – it takes months and years for attachment. As RQ points out before that it is ‘survival’ mode.
I find it painful to look back at the video of handover and the video of our trip. Knowing my daughter as I do now – even when she had calmed down after the initial massive stress reaction, even in the second week when she is smiling in the video, even when we had been home for weeks and months I now see how stressed she still was and it makes me ache.
I said at the time and since that she clung to my husband and I like a shipwreck survivor clings to the only available liferaft – we were her new ‘constant’ in a sea of new places, and experiences. But that was survival mode. We had to work on attachment and that included going into ‘lock down’ – relatives found it the hardest to understand but as I explained to my parents, unless she learns what parents are for she can’t understand what grandparents are for (that they got).
Regards
Magnolia’s Friend
January 6th, 2010 at 8:15 pm
Whoops posted that last one in the wrong thread – shows you I shouldn’t try and type while on hold with my telco