refuses to use the potty????

[LABlain]

Ok first daughter was using the potty no problem completely trained at about 2years and 4 months.
Second daughter turned 3 a few weeks ago and I have not gotten one drop out of her on the potty. I have tryed everything. She is a smart girl. Doesn't even seem to bother her to walk around with a fully loaded diaper. uggghhh. Any ideas would be appreciated.
Deperate in SC

[China Mom 2B]

Our DD turned 3 in November and we are having the same problem. She will tell me after she has gone and then wants to sit on the potty. Likes to wipe, flush and wash her hands but not a drop out of her.

Her preschool/daycare teacher tells me not to worry that she will get it. DD will train when she is ready.

Sorry, no advice but I hope someone else can help us both!

[kccmom]

No advice, but we have the same issue too.  Ds is 31 months, but he is deathly afraid of the potty and pull ups.  He will scream if a pull up comes near him, and he will hug his diaper. 

Good luck! I hope someone has some advice.

[LABlain]

Thanks at least I dont' feel like I am the only one with this problem. Maybe someone will know what will help us.

[Windthrow]

Our daughter was not at all interested in using the potty until she was almost 3 1/2. We got the sense she was ready and took away the diapers one Saturday morning two months ago and it was done. No accidents at all that weekend and just a few at daycare the following week. She doesnt need any reminders at all and just goes when she needs to very reliably.

[ladeeesquire]

No advice, but we have the same issue too.  Ds is 31 months, but he is deathly afraid of the potty and pull ups.  He will scream if a pull up comes near him, and he will hug his diaper. 

Good luck! I hope someone has some advice.

I would "run out" of diapers... "all gone"

[SabrinaSpencer]

My only advice is  don't stress about it-- they will simply want to do it one day.

Funny thing is old DD told me every time she had to do a BM (from the time home - 21 months to about one month ago- 27 months)  All of a sudden she has refused to sit on the potty.  I thought she would train early because she showed so much interest but I guess she changed her mind! 

[GoldenGirl]

Argh!!!!! I'm so glad to see this thread!! This has got to be the most frustrating thing for me right now.  My daughter just turned 3. From about age 2 1/2, we've been talking about how, when she's 3, she'll start using the potty. She was all for it! Then her birthday came and... nothin'. She said she wanted a potty seat... $20 later... nothin'. She said she wanted pull-ups... nothin'. She said she wants to wear big-girl underwear... 47 loads of laundry and several spot-cleanings of our carpet later... nothin'. We talk about it all the time and she seems so ready! She just won't freakin' pee on the potty!!! 

(Can you tell I'm just a bit frustrated? I know, I know... she'll get it eventually. It will all work out. She won't be wearing a diaper on her wedding day. I know I shouldn't stress about it, it's just so hard...)

[dahlia]

We're in the same situation!  Our DD was going to the potty about 50% of the time before she turned 3 years old in January.  Now, she just tells us after she does something in her pull-up!  Hhmmm....good to know we are not the only ones!  Mind you, we haven't been pushing her too much during the winter months these days with all the clothes she wears, so we just put on overnight pull-ups on her all the time to avoid ucky messes!  Not fond of her just wear big girl underwear only yet, just too messy! Not fond of doing tons of laundry either! And yes, our carpet has had a few accidents also!  Like someone has said already, let's not sweat it.  It will happen!  Guess it all depends on why one wants to have a child potty trained before he/she is really ready?  Perhaps if there are more kids within a family that are close in ages, well that could be a reason to work on potty training??? Some work on it more before the age of three because of daycare/preschool etc.  We try to get her to at least go on the toilet after she wakes up and before she goes to bed at nights.  Some days she is good at doing this, and other days not so.  But we figure at least these two times of the day if we are consistent something will kick in at some point.  At least if a child knows he/she is doing something and says something while it's happening, that is better than not saying anything at all as they get older.  But like someone else has said, what adult is still wearing diapers?  I figure there are more important things to worry about, like how our DD communicates with other children in a playgroup.  She tends to let the kids who are pushy just step ahead of her in the line up for a slide ride for instance.  Our DD's English is improving but it is the bullies and the pushy kids in playgroups that worry me more than our DD being potty trained right now.  Guess it is also what a family considers a priority.  For some it is potty training. Someone once wrote on RQ, it more about parent training than the child for potty training too (if the child is ready!)

[sierrasmom]

Basically, potty training is a developmental milestone..so pretty much it happens when everything is in sync...pretty much like rolling over, sitting up, crawling, walking, talking, etc.  No 2 kids do it at the same time.  She will let you know when she is ready.  You can talk about it, read books about it ....all that will make her think about it more!!!  It will happen soon!!!

[dahlia]

Thanks for your reassurance Sierrasmom!

[kittymama]

Basically, potty training is a developmental milestone..so pretty much it happens when everything is in sync...pretty much like rolling over, sitting up, crawling, walking, talking, etc.  No 2 kids do it at the same time.  She will let you know when she is ready.  You can talk about it, read books about it ....all that will make her think about it more!!!  It will happen soon!!!

Yes, but what if your child was once potty trained (in China) and at one point (5 months ago) would tell you when she needed a diaper change and would sit on potty whenever you offered...and now has no interest? What does it mean when they just lose interest after doing it so easily months & months earlier?? We have tried stickers, m&m's, preschool peer pressure, dropping the subject, raising the subject, diapers/pullups/nothing.... she just won't go! My dd is still under 2.5 but when we met her at 23 months, she was already trained. We didn't know the cues in China and lost it gradually over time...I had such high hopes for an early potty-er. Another frustrated mom here! 

[dahlia]

Kittymamay, our DD is exactly the same as your DD!  I've decided to jut not "sweat it"! and let things be for now.  Think sometimes peer pressure by going to daycare/preschool can influence a child's potty training regime also to some extent.  Our DD doesn't yet go to preschool.  Why do we worry about potty training anyways????

[Jen08]

We have been home two months and been gradually progressing in potty training.  At first she wouldn't even think about sitting on the potty chair  and even acted like she was trying really hard not to go.  So we didn't push the issue to much, a couple weeks ago I decided to try again first thing in the morning as I was running the bath and she went.  She acted really scared about actually going in the potty, but after seeing how excited I got she calmed down.  So now it's a morning ritual to sit on the potty as I run the bath water and she goes every morning now.  She's woke up dry for about a week now!   It's a start, maybe eventually we will  progress past the morning!

[willowflower]

It's simple.  Just wait until she's ready because honestly, you don't have much choice on this one issue...it's something they have control of (and not uncommon for them to assert their control in this area).  Many kids aren't ready at three and it shouldn't be a big deal.  Maybe just backing off will help her come around.  Don't worry...she'll be out of diapers by the time she goes to college