Ow for a Kiss
TwinkleToes has started making up “ow’ies” so she can get kisses.
I’ve tried to figure out how to tell her that she doesn’t have to pretend something hurts to get a kiss, but I haven’t managed that yet.
She’ll sign that something hurts and make an “oh” sound to get me to kiss it. I kiss it, then she points to her cheek, and I kiss it, too. She smiles and laughs and I hug her and we go back to playing.
I tried saying “I don’t see an ow’ie - do you want a kiss?” and kissing her on the cheek. But she insists upon the ow’ie until I kiss it.
Any other ideas?
I’m happy that she’s finally figured out that you get extra attention when you are hurt. This was not in her reality when we got her.
But it bothers me that she feels she needs a reason for a kiss. I want her to know she can just come get kisses whenever she wants them.
July 20th, 2007 at 11:27 am
We get a lot of the “owwies”/special reasons for kisses, too. It does take time to convince little people that kisses can be for no reason at all. I just think Her Imperial Majesty likes the attention on her terms, which is okay with me, I guess. I just try to give lots of kissies randomly and hope she gets the point. But it’s been 2.5 years…maybe it’s just a kid thing? rather than an adoptive kid thing?
Fondly,
The Hegemom
July 21st, 2007 at 10:05 am
RQ, I would just keep giving her not-asked-for kisses.
Also, I’ve noticed with Lydia, while she is not comfortable coming up to us and asking for them, her body language says she wants them. :) For instance, she will plunk herself down in my lap and tilt her head to the side, showing me her neck, so I can give her a “zerbert”.
Good luck!
July 21st, 2007 at 9:02 pm
Time will take care of that.
We are 6 months home. She has been Dada us both, this week daughter and I visited relatives for a few days wo dada.
She had her momma light bulb moment. She now gets we are 2 folks who love her like crazy with different names. YIPEE
The kisses on the 2 way street will come………………….
July 22nd, 2007 at 8:15 pm
When our daughter first started to walk, I started playing a variation of “I’m gonna get you” with her, but I changed it to, “I’m gonna KISS you!” She loved having me chase her and running away from me, but she really loved to be caught. I would catch her and smother her with kisses. I’d then say “I’m gonna kiss you!” and she’d run away again and giggle hysterically when I’d catch her and love her up.
July 25th, 2007 at 8:57 am
I get the impression that your concern is that she feels this way due to her history and being adopted. I can’t say for sure that this isn’t the case, but I wanted to reassure you that this is natural behavior for any child. My bio son did the same sort of thing when he was a toddler. Just give kisses whenever she wants - or doesnt ;-) and she’ll be just fine!